Blog : #16

Our youth group is having a car wash tomorrow at Rite Aid to help raise money for medical bills. I am just amazed at how the Lord has taken care of our needs! I shouldn't be, He is so faithful! Every time we start to wonder how we are going to make it another check shows up in the mail. I can see the Lord rearranging my life and it's kind of weird, like watching a play. I got home yesterday after treatments and just sat in the driveway talking to Patsy and thinking... I don't know what the Lord is doing or why, but I can feel things changing. I feel very unworthy of even the help that people offer. Who am I? I'm just some average "Joe" who is fighting cancer and there are so many others who are as well. I find myself wanting to do all I can to tell others about what I am doing and allow God to use me anyway He wants. It feels like I'm coming out of hibernation and wiping the sleep from my eyes and starting to focus and what I am focusing on is so different from what I have ever seen before. Kind of like salvation. It makes you look at things very differently and react and act differently as well. I hope I am making sense, because this is hard to put into words.

It has also given me a burden for my doctors and their ministry. They love God so much and because of their love for God they love their patients whole heartedly. It is just incredible to watch these people come through their doors and the devotion they feel towards them is unstoppable! They feel gratitude that my doctors were willing to do whatever they could to heal them. Not just treat symptoms but heal them!! They have gone so above and beyond with me it blows my mind! One of them said this past week..."Robin, I know this is expensive for you right now, just keep track of what you owe us and pay it as you can." They weren't even worried, they just knew they were supposed to treat me and God would make a way. If they told me that once they told me 20 times. How can you not feel love and appreciation for someone who is willing to do that? I pray all the time that the Lord will bless their ministry and keep them financially stable so they will never have to close their doors.

Needless to say, it has changed my circle of friends as well. I am getting to know so many new people because of this. But, it is all in God's hands. How comforting!! Come what may, I'll continue to be thankful!

Well, I am off of hyperbaric's for a week and my brother and family is coming for a visit. I will still be going up on Monday because a friend of mine has an aunt who is coming up from NC to start treatments and she is a little nervous. It will be a good week. I also have a teen from Missouri coming in to visit as well! I'm so excited!!!!!